From Virginia
Posted: Mon Mar 26, 2012 2:30 am
Hello everyone. I have been referred to as “V.” I am the person who was blamed for James Flick and JZ Knight's break up—although, as we all know, you can’t break up a happy couple. I take responsibility for the justifications I made to myself regarding how I got involved in the situation. I want to share my story and then move on, as my life is wonderful now and I don’t feel the need to “rescue” or “enlighten” anyone who still attends RSE. Writing this gives me closure and explains things from my perspective.
I have been blatantly slandered by JZ for the last couple years and until now have not struck back; I have not publicly defended myself nor presented the facts that took place—I thought this would all just go away. Since JZ has decided to continue with her character assassination of me, years after-the-fact, I will now “speak my truth.” Since some of this happened quite some time ago I will do my best to put the events in chronological order and speak honestly about what transpired.
One day Robert Jones (Sir Robert) invited me to a poker game at his house; a mutual friend had told him that I liked poker. James was there. I was not initially impressed. James acted immature and unsophisticated. Later I was invited to the ranch to play. James seemed overly attentive and soon became flirtatious. I thought nothing of it since he was with JZ and I was still married. After months of this, while he was drunk at a game at someone else’s house, he said something that confirmed that his flirting was not imagined and that he was struggling with some feelings. We decided to be friends and make sure we didn’t cross the line.
Eventually, for my own reasons, my marriage ended (we had been having problems for some time). James and I continued to be friends. We would meet at poker tournaments and have coffee or a drink. One night after about a year of playing poker and being friends, we kissed. As far as his relationship with JZ, I got the story that they had drifted apart. I did believe he cared about JZ, but James told me that she was pretty smitten over Lars.
James related that JZ had come into the work-shop and asked him to clean it up (or something along that line) and he said “This is the only place that’s mine, you have the whole house, can’t I keep it the way I want?” She responded, “this isn’t yours either, it’s all mine.” It appeared that, after a twelve-year relationship, this was a sobering moment for James.
The next few months, we began spending increasing amounts of time together. I had feelings that were growing—but also mixed over his lack of ability to make any changes in his life while seemingly unhappy. At times I told him to go away and never text me or call me again. At times, I stopped going to the casino to meet up with him. I was really becoming fed up. Then, when we would talk, he sounded lost and I would feel bad knowing it was a tough spot to be in.
At this point it was getting painful, so I decided to stop seeing James (again). A girlfriend of mine was having a birthday and at the last minute had changed plans to go out of town, so I told her we could do a little something at my house. I thought it would be the two of us and a couple of her friends. She decided to invite 20 people (you just have to know her I guess). The worst part was one of the people she invited was James. He got there early and pulled me into a room. I said, “I did not invite you, (my friend) did.” I wanted to be clear. He kissed me and told me he was going to do something—that he had to do something. I honestly believed at that moment he was leaving JZ. Everything in what he was saying and doing told me he didn’t want us to be apart. He did mention that he “had to get through the (Whitewind Weaver) trial first”. Later that night when everyone left he stayed for awhile. I figured our being together was imminent. That was the first time we were really “together.”
The trial began where JZ sued Whitewind Weaver for “stealing” disciplines. James had been attending the trial daily. He told me other students were there for support, so one day I stopped in. On a break, James and I took off and went down to Olympia and walked the pier and talked. At this point I was a complete mess. I was so mad at him for not having had “the talk” with JZ and I was mad at myself for still talking to him. He seemed to be doing a lot of soul searching because of something that had just happened during the trial:
James told me that JZ was asked by the defendant’s attorney something similar to: “Did you ever channel Jesus?” James was perplexed over her answer. JZ said, under oath, “No.” Now many people remember the tape she marketed as “Jesus Speaks, JZ channels Jesus” (or something like that). It was represented as Jesus being channeled by JZ. The judge would not allow the tape to be introduced by the defendant. When James asked her later about her response in court, she said something to the effect, “Oh that silly thing, that was just me and some friends doing an acting (workshop or impromptu).“ James was pretty disturbed by this. I asked him, “Do you think she is a fraud?” He said very sincerely he didn’t know. He told me one time years ago a small group of friends asked her to imitate Ramtha. She did it so precisely that he said everyone just looked at each other speechless.
Later, a friend of JZs who had been at my friend’s birthday party had noticed an attraction between us and called me to ask if something was going on. I hesitated but told her yes and that it had just recently gotten physical (which was true) and that I expected he would be talking to JZ very soon. Of course very soon turned out to be weeks, but eventually he told JZ what was going on and he called to tell me he had his things with him. He told me he thought that he should stay with his sister to kind of buffer this for JZ and to give her time. That made sense to me.
After that he was being really covert. He was at my house quite a bit, he even had one room completely filled with his things, but then he went to his sisters to call JZ, or spend a night to make it look like he was staying there more than he was. When he started visiting JZ, she would pull out all the stops. She had “Ram” calling me a “succubus” and trashing me. James had apparently been “seduced.” By the time he/she was done, I swear James himself was convinced that the devil (me) made him do it. The big spin became “it was all about SEX!!” It was like the song in the musical Chicago “they both reached for the gun.” It became the community spin; JZ chants it and everyone repeats it:”it was all for the sex.” “He doesn’t love the other women…it’s just SEX!!!”
JZ started making appearances around town and drew crowds to tell her sob story and never failed to mention it was all about sex. Wow, we had been in a virtually non-physical relationship for a year. By the time the puppet master was done, everyone was convinced that James fell from grace because of a “succubus, whore”. James actually seemed to be buying it himself (yeah, I was seduced, that’s it!) Huh? However, we did continue the same routine, breaking up and then missing each other. I was hoping he was just temporarily panicking and that in time he would find some courage.
Then I received a phone call from Steve Klein who read a letter to me from JZ that was subsequently emailed to me as well. It informed me that I had been thrown out of school. Then it went on: “Congratulations you got your card you made it to the void, you stole my sweet man from me”. Getting thrown out of school hit me pretty hard. James was defensive of me for a short time, but not enough to skip his next event. He went and danced and partied. He could NOT handle not being accepted by that community. It was too much for him. Every time he was with me after that, I was pretty nasty. I called him weak, I called him a coward, I called him a liar. I was mad that he could continue to go back to the school I had been thrown out of and where I was being lied about by JZ.
The divide and conquer was working for JZ. Things weren’t going very well. I was stressed out and I was mad at “Ramtha.” After all I believed it to be “Ramtha’s” School of Enlightenment, not JZ’s School of Enlightenment. I thought JZ was some kind of strong spiritual woman and then I found out just how despicable she was. Everyone was falling off the pedestal. James came over one night just prior to our final break up and he was sitting on the couch with me. We were kissing a little because I was so upset about everything going on, but we were breaking up. I was mostly upset that he was falling for her crap. I now understand that the pressure was enormous. JZ had already started the character assassination on both of us. Also you have to remember that James has spent half his life as a student of the “Ram” and there is no easy way to come out of that.
I thought I heard some footsteps on my porch. I dismissed it as it was probably my mom (who lives just down the road and is always dropping stuff off). I figured she was on her way to visit, saw us and left. Next thing I know, James is getting a series of text-messages from JZ calling me the “Devils whore” and he is the “devil “and calling me so many disgusting vulgar names that I really can’t even write them. And it went on and on and on and on. JZ sent pictures of my house to prove she had been there. She was out of her mind. None of that really bothered me too much when I considered she was human and hurting, but when the texts got incredibly religious, I was disturbed. It was like the worst fire and brimstone you could ever imagine; against EVERYTHING we have been taught. I wish I could remember it all but at some point, I remember saying to James, “I don’t want to see anymore of this, she’s just sick.” It was however added to my ever growing doubt that “Ramtha” existed.
It gets even more disturbing; After that incident, JZ told friends close to her (which got right back to me and James of course) that while at my house “Ram” showed her what James was really like by showing him having anal sex with me. WHAT????? We were kissing on the couch with my daughter running around us. James was furious but still not enough. He just told her she needed to get a hold of herself and stop the (b.s.).
When James first left her, she called all the poker players and tore them up. She had some of them in tears. “I am the channel, how could you not tell me.” So, why didn’t RAMTHA tell her? I don’t know, but “he” sure tore into everyone who didn’t tell her at the next event. The reason was, there hadn’t been anything to tell- no affair, no relationship until right at the end about a month before he left. What were they supposed to say exactly? James and I watched the live-stream in horror as “Ram” tried to get Steve Carlton (who has a girlfriend or wife, not sure) to go out with JZ. It was like she was embarrassing herself more and more. Then he/she yelled to certain people “Why didn’t you tell your channel?” ?????
Eventually it all calmed down. I was really wrecked about how someone I had cared about and coddled and waited for so long could throw me under the bus and run. I’m not sure how coincidental it was, but one week after I told him I was going broke and might lose my house, he took the rest of his stuff. Yes—good riddance but it was tough, because of where I was at the time: I had lost my school, many of my “friends,” my health (I got down to 98 lbs), my business, and James was at the ranch partying. Wow.
After about a year (I saved my house and was feeling well), I wanted to go back to the ranch. I called Steve Klein when I was ready and was told JZ said okay. I guess, since James was already on to someone else, she didn’t care if I was there or not as long as I paid. I think I just wanted to walk in with my head held high after all the lies and nonsense. I just wanted to go look at my “teacher” again to see if there really was a purpose to it all and if it was all some master plan for growth. I only went a couple of times and then said to myself: if it’s a fraud why go, if not Ram is with me. So I quit the school without fanfare.
I am now happier than I have ever been with a beautiful man of integrity, courage, class, and unconditional love, a person who has never attended RSE but who could teach them a lot over there. So why am I finally speaking out?
At this last event my mother had to be the one to tell me that “Ram” had referred to me as a “whore” about three times. “He” had gotten done singing JZs praises for some ridiculous length of time and then of course had to insult James again and then said (it varies slightly as to who was telling me what happened) “and he left (JZ) for a whore”... or a “f—ing whore.” Luckily, at this point in my life I am in such a great place that I was mad, but surprisingly grateful, for I finally have closure to the question of “Ram” and I finally feel completely free. Now we all know that JZ Knight has stolen about every man she has been with from someone else, and cheated on at least three, that I know about (the dentist, Jeff Knight and JO). We all know she has been trying to steal Lars from Janine. We all know she sells spirituality for money—but I’m the whore. Okay.
“Ram” came clean about JZ hitting on Lars after all tongues were already wagging. Janine, Lars’s wife, has always been kind and has always taken people at their worst and embraced them. She has always been a friend to JZ and this is what she got. Of course “Ram” will bail JZ out with talking about JZ's and Roses' past lives and how they are meant to be together—that’s of course if JZ thinks she can get him. I figure she isn’t succeeding and since she can’t just get anything she wants anymore, she is throwing a public tantrum through “Ram”. The worst part about the “whore” reference was how many times “Ram” has said that the church made women out to be whores. Women are degraded—on and on. Somehow as the frog slowly boils, no one has seemed to realize how disgustingly judgmental JZSE has become.
Why did I stay so long? We all know the major messages:
1) If you leave you are a “victim” or “unwilling to change”
2) If “Ram” does or says anything judgmental, unloving, contradictory or horrible, he has “a mind we can’t understand and it’s all purposeful.”
3) Many of us truly do believe in a lot of the information that came out of the school. Of course the more I study, the more I realize it was information that was already out there some almost verbatim.
A few years ago, many of you asked to hear from me. I was in a horrible place, but I felt that no matter how sick JZ was acting she is a “human.” I will say that if she had just been nasty to me privately, this would have remained private. To continue at this point to slander me in my community through “Ram” shows her ever-growing frustration over where her actions have landed her in life. I don’t think any of us can really have an impact on the students at RSE. Everyone will drink the Kool-Aide until it just doesn’t taste right anymore. I still have great friends and family in school that I love. I expect I will lose some or many after this. Each time I go through something difficult the quality of my friends increases, so, as I see it, I have nothing to lose.
For now, I am free at last, and I’m sure, as time passes, it will become more and more clear to most everyone who and what JZ really is. Until then we all should just enjoy the freedom and the wonderful life we have and thank our lucky stars to be away from the never ending contradictions and hypocrisy of Judith Darlene Hampton Zebra Knight.
—Virginia
I have been blatantly slandered by JZ for the last couple years and until now have not struck back; I have not publicly defended myself nor presented the facts that took place—I thought this would all just go away. Since JZ has decided to continue with her character assassination of me, years after-the-fact, I will now “speak my truth.” Since some of this happened quite some time ago I will do my best to put the events in chronological order and speak honestly about what transpired.
One day Robert Jones (Sir Robert) invited me to a poker game at his house; a mutual friend had told him that I liked poker. James was there. I was not initially impressed. James acted immature and unsophisticated. Later I was invited to the ranch to play. James seemed overly attentive and soon became flirtatious. I thought nothing of it since he was with JZ and I was still married. After months of this, while he was drunk at a game at someone else’s house, he said something that confirmed that his flirting was not imagined and that he was struggling with some feelings. We decided to be friends and make sure we didn’t cross the line.
Eventually, for my own reasons, my marriage ended (we had been having problems for some time). James and I continued to be friends. We would meet at poker tournaments and have coffee or a drink. One night after about a year of playing poker and being friends, we kissed. As far as his relationship with JZ, I got the story that they had drifted apart. I did believe he cared about JZ, but James told me that she was pretty smitten over Lars.
James related that JZ had come into the work-shop and asked him to clean it up (or something along that line) and he said “This is the only place that’s mine, you have the whole house, can’t I keep it the way I want?” She responded, “this isn’t yours either, it’s all mine.” It appeared that, after a twelve-year relationship, this was a sobering moment for James.
The next few months, we began spending increasing amounts of time together. I had feelings that were growing—but also mixed over his lack of ability to make any changes in his life while seemingly unhappy. At times I told him to go away and never text me or call me again. At times, I stopped going to the casino to meet up with him. I was really becoming fed up. Then, when we would talk, he sounded lost and I would feel bad knowing it was a tough spot to be in.
At this point it was getting painful, so I decided to stop seeing James (again). A girlfriend of mine was having a birthday and at the last minute had changed plans to go out of town, so I told her we could do a little something at my house. I thought it would be the two of us and a couple of her friends. She decided to invite 20 people (you just have to know her I guess). The worst part was one of the people she invited was James. He got there early and pulled me into a room. I said, “I did not invite you, (my friend) did.” I wanted to be clear. He kissed me and told me he was going to do something—that he had to do something. I honestly believed at that moment he was leaving JZ. Everything in what he was saying and doing told me he didn’t want us to be apart. He did mention that he “had to get through the (Whitewind Weaver) trial first”. Later that night when everyone left he stayed for awhile. I figured our being together was imminent. That was the first time we were really “together.”
The trial began where JZ sued Whitewind Weaver for “stealing” disciplines. James had been attending the trial daily. He told me other students were there for support, so one day I stopped in. On a break, James and I took off and went down to Olympia and walked the pier and talked. At this point I was a complete mess. I was so mad at him for not having had “the talk” with JZ and I was mad at myself for still talking to him. He seemed to be doing a lot of soul searching because of something that had just happened during the trial:
James told me that JZ was asked by the defendant’s attorney something similar to: “Did you ever channel Jesus?” James was perplexed over her answer. JZ said, under oath, “No.” Now many people remember the tape she marketed as “Jesus Speaks, JZ channels Jesus” (or something like that). It was represented as Jesus being channeled by JZ. The judge would not allow the tape to be introduced by the defendant. When James asked her later about her response in court, she said something to the effect, “Oh that silly thing, that was just me and some friends doing an acting (workshop or impromptu).“ James was pretty disturbed by this. I asked him, “Do you think she is a fraud?” He said very sincerely he didn’t know. He told me one time years ago a small group of friends asked her to imitate Ramtha. She did it so precisely that he said everyone just looked at each other speechless.
Later, a friend of JZs who had been at my friend’s birthday party had noticed an attraction between us and called me to ask if something was going on. I hesitated but told her yes and that it had just recently gotten physical (which was true) and that I expected he would be talking to JZ very soon. Of course very soon turned out to be weeks, but eventually he told JZ what was going on and he called to tell me he had his things with him. He told me he thought that he should stay with his sister to kind of buffer this for JZ and to give her time. That made sense to me.
After that he was being really covert. He was at my house quite a bit, he even had one room completely filled with his things, but then he went to his sisters to call JZ, or spend a night to make it look like he was staying there more than he was. When he started visiting JZ, she would pull out all the stops. She had “Ram” calling me a “succubus” and trashing me. James had apparently been “seduced.” By the time he/she was done, I swear James himself was convinced that the devil (me) made him do it. The big spin became “it was all about SEX!!” It was like the song in the musical Chicago “they both reached for the gun.” It became the community spin; JZ chants it and everyone repeats it:”it was all for the sex.” “He doesn’t love the other women…it’s just SEX!!!”
JZ started making appearances around town and drew crowds to tell her sob story and never failed to mention it was all about sex. Wow, we had been in a virtually non-physical relationship for a year. By the time the puppet master was done, everyone was convinced that James fell from grace because of a “succubus, whore”. James actually seemed to be buying it himself (yeah, I was seduced, that’s it!) Huh? However, we did continue the same routine, breaking up and then missing each other. I was hoping he was just temporarily panicking and that in time he would find some courage.
Then I received a phone call from Steve Klein who read a letter to me from JZ that was subsequently emailed to me as well. It informed me that I had been thrown out of school. Then it went on: “Congratulations you got your card you made it to the void, you stole my sweet man from me”. Getting thrown out of school hit me pretty hard. James was defensive of me for a short time, but not enough to skip his next event. He went and danced and partied. He could NOT handle not being accepted by that community. It was too much for him. Every time he was with me after that, I was pretty nasty. I called him weak, I called him a coward, I called him a liar. I was mad that he could continue to go back to the school I had been thrown out of and where I was being lied about by JZ.
The divide and conquer was working for JZ. Things weren’t going very well. I was stressed out and I was mad at “Ramtha.” After all I believed it to be “Ramtha’s” School of Enlightenment, not JZ’s School of Enlightenment. I thought JZ was some kind of strong spiritual woman and then I found out just how despicable she was. Everyone was falling off the pedestal. James came over one night just prior to our final break up and he was sitting on the couch with me. We were kissing a little because I was so upset about everything going on, but we were breaking up. I was mostly upset that he was falling for her crap. I now understand that the pressure was enormous. JZ had already started the character assassination on both of us. Also you have to remember that James has spent half his life as a student of the “Ram” and there is no easy way to come out of that.
I thought I heard some footsteps on my porch. I dismissed it as it was probably my mom (who lives just down the road and is always dropping stuff off). I figured she was on her way to visit, saw us and left. Next thing I know, James is getting a series of text-messages from JZ calling me the “Devils whore” and he is the “devil “and calling me so many disgusting vulgar names that I really can’t even write them. And it went on and on and on and on. JZ sent pictures of my house to prove she had been there. She was out of her mind. None of that really bothered me too much when I considered she was human and hurting, but when the texts got incredibly religious, I was disturbed. It was like the worst fire and brimstone you could ever imagine; against EVERYTHING we have been taught. I wish I could remember it all but at some point, I remember saying to James, “I don’t want to see anymore of this, she’s just sick.” It was however added to my ever growing doubt that “Ramtha” existed.
It gets even more disturbing; After that incident, JZ told friends close to her (which got right back to me and James of course) that while at my house “Ram” showed her what James was really like by showing him having anal sex with me. WHAT????? We were kissing on the couch with my daughter running around us. James was furious but still not enough. He just told her she needed to get a hold of herself and stop the (b.s.).
When James first left her, she called all the poker players and tore them up. She had some of them in tears. “I am the channel, how could you not tell me.” So, why didn’t RAMTHA tell her? I don’t know, but “he” sure tore into everyone who didn’t tell her at the next event. The reason was, there hadn’t been anything to tell- no affair, no relationship until right at the end about a month before he left. What were they supposed to say exactly? James and I watched the live-stream in horror as “Ram” tried to get Steve Carlton (who has a girlfriend or wife, not sure) to go out with JZ. It was like she was embarrassing herself more and more. Then he/she yelled to certain people “Why didn’t you tell your channel?” ?????
Eventually it all calmed down. I was really wrecked about how someone I had cared about and coddled and waited for so long could throw me under the bus and run. I’m not sure how coincidental it was, but one week after I told him I was going broke and might lose my house, he took the rest of his stuff. Yes—good riddance but it was tough, because of where I was at the time: I had lost my school, many of my “friends,” my health (I got down to 98 lbs), my business, and James was at the ranch partying. Wow.
After about a year (I saved my house and was feeling well), I wanted to go back to the ranch. I called Steve Klein when I was ready and was told JZ said okay. I guess, since James was already on to someone else, she didn’t care if I was there or not as long as I paid. I think I just wanted to walk in with my head held high after all the lies and nonsense. I just wanted to go look at my “teacher” again to see if there really was a purpose to it all and if it was all some master plan for growth. I only went a couple of times and then said to myself: if it’s a fraud why go, if not Ram is with me. So I quit the school without fanfare.
I am now happier than I have ever been with a beautiful man of integrity, courage, class, and unconditional love, a person who has never attended RSE but who could teach them a lot over there. So why am I finally speaking out?
At this last event my mother had to be the one to tell me that “Ram” had referred to me as a “whore” about three times. “He” had gotten done singing JZs praises for some ridiculous length of time and then of course had to insult James again and then said (it varies slightly as to who was telling me what happened) “and he left (JZ) for a whore”... or a “f—ing whore.” Luckily, at this point in my life I am in such a great place that I was mad, but surprisingly grateful, for I finally have closure to the question of “Ram” and I finally feel completely free. Now we all know that JZ Knight has stolen about every man she has been with from someone else, and cheated on at least three, that I know about (the dentist, Jeff Knight and JO). We all know she has been trying to steal Lars from Janine. We all know she sells spirituality for money—but I’m the whore. Okay.
“Ram” came clean about JZ hitting on Lars after all tongues were already wagging. Janine, Lars’s wife, has always been kind and has always taken people at their worst and embraced them. She has always been a friend to JZ and this is what she got. Of course “Ram” will bail JZ out with talking about JZ's and Roses' past lives and how they are meant to be together—that’s of course if JZ thinks she can get him. I figure she isn’t succeeding and since she can’t just get anything she wants anymore, she is throwing a public tantrum through “Ram”. The worst part about the “whore” reference was how many times “Ram” has said that the church made women out to be whores. Women are degraded—on and on. Somehow as the frog slowly boils, no one has seemed to realize how disgustingly judgmental JZSE has become.
Why did I stay so long? We all know the major messages:
1) If you leave you are a “victim” or “unwilling to change”
2) If “Ram” does or says anything judgmental, unloving, contradictory or horrible, he has “a mind we can’t understand and it’s all purposeful.”
3) Many of us truly do believe in a lot of the information that came out of the school. Of course the more I study, the more I realize it was information that was already out there some almost verbatim.
A few years ago, many of you asked to hear from me. I was in a horrible place, but I felt that no matter how sick JZ was acting she is a “human.” I will say that if she had just been nasty to me privately, this would have remained private. To continue at this point to slander me in my community through “Ram” shows her ever-growing frustration over where her actions have landed her in life. I don’t think any of us can really have an impact on the students at RSE. Everyone will drink the Kool-Aide until it just doesn’t taste right anymore. I still have great friends and family in school that I love. I expect I will lose some or many after this. Each time I go through something difficult the quality of my friends increases, so, as I see it, I have nothing to lose.
For now, I am free at last, and I’m sure, as time passes, it will become more and more clear to most everyone who and what JZ really is. Until then we all should just enjoy the freedom and the wonderful life we have and thank our lucky stars to be away from the never ending contradictions and hypocrisy of Judith Darlene Hampton Zebra Knight.
—Virginia