RECOVERY & MOVING ON
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An Open Letter to Judith (JZ Knight)
23 Jun 2009
Although it is not my habit to place such things in the public domain, I am posting this letter to you here because I suspect that you do visit www.enlightenmefree.com (EMF). I also know that rather than taking care of your own correspondence, that you have staff that read and answer personal letters for you. A letter such as this would likely not reach you before it was read by others even if I sent it to you directly; therefore I choose to present it as an open letter for all who care to read it.
This letter is a long one but I trust that you will give it your full attention; for I paid you that consideration for three years of my life. I invite others to write similar letters to you so that perhaps you will come to realize the personal impact your actions have on the lives of those who once trusted you and who trust you still.
In the coming months I will be posting evidence on this, the EMF message board to support the belief that a great deal of what you, and you as Ramtha (TM) present as original material has been taken from a series of books by Vera Stanley Alder. There is evidence that you have taken some of your material from other sources as well, but what I present will focus on this particular series of books.
Vera Stanley Alder began writing her books on mysticism and ancient knowledge over 70 years ago, well before you created Ramtha or Ramtha's School of Enlightenment (RSE) TM. All of Vera Stanley Alder's books are classified as fictional compositions. It is worth noting that the books entitled, "The Masters of the Far East", "The Nine Faces of Christ" and "The Red Lion", which are on your recommended reading list for students of RSE, are also works of fiction; yet curiously the Vera Stanley Alder books are not on that list. Nor are they to be found in the RSE campus book store while the other three are. I find that odd because it seems that there are more similarities between RSE theories and those expressed by Vera Stanley Alder in her books than in any of the other recommended reading materials. All of the books mentioned here present inspiring stories of mystical encounters as well as interesting theories with respect to spirituality, but the Vera Stanley Alder books truly stand out with respect to RSE.
Judith, I have heard you quote phrases from the books by Vera Stanley Alder when you appear as Ramtha. As that character you also adopt the vocabulary that is utilized by the writer even though the words and phrases that Vera Stanley Alder uses in her writings are not commonly used in conversation. Because you as Ramtha utilize the same words and phrases to the extent that some of them form a part of the character Ramtha, it seems that there is more than a coincidental relationship between you and what is written on the pages of these books.
A compilation of material from Vera Stanley Alder's books could easily be perceived as RSE's compendium of spiritual theory; because what is presented by you and RSE as original ancient wisdom teachings can be found in the quotes, ideas and theories presented in the series of Vera Stanley Alder's books. Vera Stanley Alder's description of the levels of reality as well as her explanation of the workings of the brain and how the endocrine system is related to the chakra system are essentially the same as what you as Ramtha lay claim to. Changing the word chakra to the word seal does not make the bulk of the material original to you. It is understood however, that in making a few changes to Vera Stanley Alder's descriptions you have been able to claim that legally under copyright and trademark.
The volume of evidence that you have based your material on the writings of Vera Stanley Alder is so extensive that it can not be dismissed as coincidence by anyone who is capable of critical thinking. I am fully aware that there are people who may not have that critical thinking ability at present. Specifically, for those who are devotees of Ramtha and RSE that inability is likely due to the mind altering programming dispensed by you, you as Ramtha and by RSE. Among other things, such programming serves to remove independent and critical thought. That too is understood.
I know the strength and hold of that programming very well Judith because as a student of RSE, I too was pressed into that mental place where critical thinking was dismissed as the most undesirable thing a student could be possessed by. You, you as Ramtha as well as RSE staff emphasized that the questioning that such thinking revolves around was the disease of doubt; and that was the very thing that robbed masters of their power. As a student of RSE I was repeatedly told to overcome such thoughts and proclaim that any delusion I chose to be my truth, as the only truth. This false image was to not only be claimed outwardly but was to be lived, "to the exclusion of all else". With ease I can tell you now that while I was in the deluded state of mind that is promoted at RSE, I would have dismissed the claim of plagiarism on your part with a predictable pattern of deluded thought. So strong was the programming that I received through RSE that the generation of such a thought process would have required almost no effort on my part at all.
It would have been an automatic response to counter the claim with the argument that Ramtha had traveled through time to provide the information to Vera Stanley Alder, and that the author of the series of books had copied the material from Ramtha. I would have held to that belief just as strongly as I once held to the belief that Ramtha had participated in the creation and enlightenment of Jesus Christ. That is after all what you promote as a truth at RSE and I, like many others came to believe all that you as Ramtha said; despite the critical thinking arguments going on in what you call the monkey mind (a term that has its origin in eastern religions). I reveal this now for those who may read this letter; that they understand the extent of the mind control and programming that your followers are subject to.
Hopefully what I present will reveal that the so called ancient wisdom teachings of RSE are likely based on what Vera Stanley Alder claims to have been sourced from her own "visions or due to wishful thinking". Vera Stanley Alder acted responsibly when she wrote the introduction to her second book; stating that the source of her material was based in fantasy. You, on the other hand have not made that clear, choosing instead to
present it as first hand factual knowledge.
Providing the reviews of Vera Stanley Alder's books as it relates to RSE, to those who are questioning what you teach and what is taught at RSE under your direction is being done to assist those who desire the information. It comes from that intent alone. As others take it upon themselves to present specific references to books, articles, and the very religions that you as Ramtha enjoy debasing, the actual sources of your material will surely be brought forward more and more. There is a solid body of evidence to support the belief that a great deal of your material has been sourced through plagiarism. It needs only to be compiled and recorded but because the volume of evidence is so great, that in itself is quite an undertaking. Nevertheless it is well worth the effort so that the material that RSE promotes, including the idea that Ramtha is an enlightened god, can more easily be recognized as creations that are based in fantasy and/or wishful thinking.
In undertaking this project let me be absolutely clear that from my side there is no intent to harm you. Rather it is my desire that what is to be revealed may be of assistance to you personally. I sincerely hope that you see it this way and that maybe you can also see that now there is an opportunity for you to retire the deception of Ramtha. I also hope that you find relief in the whole Ramtha affair finally coming to an end in a timely fashion and that you are at peace with that.
Judith, perhaps what began as your desire and dream for wealth, power and/or recognition so many years ago simply got out of hand. Maybe you believed that there was no way that you could back out of it when it became apparent that you and your Ramtha creation had attracted a following. Is it possible that the wealth, power and recognition soon possessed you and that you became enslaved by it? How sad that your own pride and greed may have empowered your followers (those who came to admire you and who even worshiped your Ramtha character), to become your tyrants. The fear of being rejected and ridiculed if you reveal the truth about how you had created the Ramtha character may likely be driving you to keep the deception going even now. Yet you have apparently admitted in court that Ramtha was created by you; for that is how you placed a trademark on it.
I suspect that what started out small and innocent enough simply grew out of control until Ramtha and the perpetuation of that character became mixed with who you really were. It seems that at some point your dream began dreaming you and that dream imprisoned your true nature. Judith, the person who has and will always trust in unconditional love and goodness is the real you. It is your true nature. There is no need to give those virtues over to an imaginary character to make them seem more powerful. The power comes through on its own accord when one extends their true nature out to embrace others with genuine compassion and love. I sincerely hope that you realize that the true nature of which I speak lives not only in you but in all people and that it is time that you set others free to live a life that embodies that.
Perhaps you didn't realize that by feeding your fantasy it took on a life of its own at the cost of that true nature; or maybe you believe that the Ramtha character which you created actually exists. I sincerely hope that it is not the latter, for that would indicate that you have yet to come to the realization of the truth. Others have already come to that realization and through their stories many more are in the process of reclaiming their own critical thinking and attaining the realization for themselves. If you do actually hold the belief that Ramtha is real, I sincerely wish you peace when and if full realization of the truth does come.
The information that Vera Stanley Alder presents in her works has been in the public domain for quite some time; a lot longer than you have Judith. Perhaps in exposing that simple fact you will be liberated from the drive to defend copyrights and trademarks that (before the ideas upon which they are based were slightly altered), should belong to someone else. Again the intent from my side is to offer information that may very well liberate you as well as others from the restrictive-thinking community that RSE has become. Perhaps it will lead you and others to cultivate a life of unconditional love, true compassion, and virtuous purpose; rather than perpetuating a life based upon isolation, terrorization and the following an illusionary god called Ramtha.
I trust that you will not delude yourself with the thinking that I am ignorant, misguided by some undesirable emotional state or that I am just another disgruntled student who could not do the work. I am none of those but whatever perception you choose to hold belongs only to you; I am not obligated to align myself with it as I once was.
In recognition of one's education not being synonymous with or any indication of one's intelligence, perhaps it is still worth revealing that I am a college graduate (health sciences), and until I went to RSE, my adult life was dedicated to the study and practice of universal loving compassion. I lived that life of service for over 25 years because that and only that brought me true joy. So perhaps you will not satisfy yourself with the belief that I am ignorant; academically, spiritually or otherwise.
As for being misguided, if I was ever misguided it was when I fully entrusted and gave the direction of my life and spiritual path over to you and RSE, for that is when the joy of compassionate service to others dwindled to an occasional faint whisper. Although I did learn a great deal about human nature while at RSE, a great deal of what I did learn directly opposed how I chose to live a purposeful life. Now that I am free of RSE and its influence, the joy of that life's purpose is returning. Judith I would find it tragic if you perceived that what I have described is an undesirable emotional state; for such a perception would reveal that a terrible sort of ignorance lives in you. In that event, I wish and pray that you find an easy path to be free of it.
As for the potential dismissal that I am a disgruntled student, I can assure you that is not the case; instead I sincerely thank you for some of the experiences that I had at RSE. If nothing else you are a great entertainer and I did enjoy the many performances that you gave while I attended events, listened to your CDs, viewed DVDs and live streams. When I consider the value of the experiences that I had through RSE, I must admit that I can now see more clearly what is not in alignment with unconditional love and I thank you for that most of all.
With respect to the disciplines that you promote as the path to enlightenment, I openly admit that I felt a sense of accomplishment and happiness when I achieved the desired goals but those things did not fulfill me as much as extending love, assistance and compassion to others. In these actions I am filled with joy and that joy causes all else to pale in comparison; but because I was manipulated into believing that doing the disciplines was the path to enlightenment I dedicated hours of every day to them. I was lead to believe that by doing so, that I would attain the ultimate joy of complete enlightenment. So I worked at it until I found cards on the fence, hit targets, navigated the labyrinth, remote viewed and more recently saw through cards, but the reconciliation of how accomplishing those things was related to joy or enlightenment eluded me while I was a student of RSE. It is only through the recognition and acceptance that no such relationship ever existed that I have come to the conclusion that RSE promotes that relationship for financial profit by stealing away one's potential for true joy in exchange for illusionary moments of pride. That fact is crystal clear to me now and I pray that I never sacrifice myself to such delusion again.
Judith, during my time as a student of RSE I had the opportunity to experience and observe the full spectrum of emotions, motivations and virtues. I experienced much of that within myself and witnessed even more through interaction with those who were also followers of RSE. You as Ramtha, you as JZ Knight as well as the staff and the attendees of RSE openly demonstrated the difference between human nature and true nature. I witnessed and experienced both and that taught me a great deal. Mostly it reinforced what I always knew; despite your instructions otherwise.
Through the last three years, I held to the faith of extending love, assistance and compassion to others, above all else. It was all that remained strong in me once I descended down your rabbit hole. Now after much contemplation I have come to the realization that it was probably that strength that contributed to my venturing deeper down into such an abyss in the first place. I dedicated my life fully to following the instructions that were presented at RSE because I trusted that you as JZ Knight, you as Ramtha as well as the RSE staff were all dedicated to pointing me in the correct direction to attaining full enlightenment. I held to that trust even while I became aware of loosing the ability to hear, act upon and trust my own soul's message and yearning.
I gave up my past at RSE's instruction and became more solitary than during the decade that I spent living in a spiritually oriented hermitage. This new form of solitude went to the depths of spiritual and mental isolation. I threw away all the photographs I had of people, places, things, times and events; including those of my childhood, my family, and everything that I had ever held dear. All because you said that I needed to move to a new neuronet and to a new neighbourhood in my brain. As Ramtha, you said that masters have no past so I shredded countless journals and gave up my religion and its paraphernalia. Everything that had an attachment to my past went to the trash. This included any reference or record of me that I managed to retrieve from others.
Then I bowed out of the lives of my family and that of my friends until only the skeleton of a few relationships survived; all because you as Ramtha said that was the way to enlightenment. You said that our problems are always due to how we relate to other people and that the remedy to all social problems was to disassociate from anyone who posed a problem. You said that this was to be done because it was more compassionate to allow others the freedom to create and experience their own reality. While I do agree with that to some degree, RSE promoted the thought that relieving the suffering of others was not in alignment with compassion; and I believed it.
Judith, people who trusted me and whom I cared about fell in and out of love, got married and divorced, and even died while I went about creating my own reality in a state of delusional detachment. I missed all of that life experience, as well as the opportunity to love them while I went about living the life of what you called "an alone journey." I now find it curious that I did not recognize the hypocrisy when you continued to maintain and recount your past while encouraging your followers to end theirs.
Between 2005 and 2008, my life became dedicated to your teachings and to your school because that is what you as Ramtha said was necessary in order to gain a greater level of enlightenment. Perhaps it is worth you knowing that my desire for complete enlightenment was never for myself but instead was motivated by the desire to be of greater benefit to others. You as JZ Knight and you as Ramtha, as well as the teachers of RSE all said that by following the instructions sincerely, mastership and complete enlightenment was achievable and that you would help deliver it.
I heard you as Ramtha say many times that "the kingdom of heaven was at hand" and because I trusted your created god, I believed that. So I followed the instructions of RSE fully and sincerely. That level of dedication in itself was not a great hardship. After all, I had been dedicated to a precept based life for over two decades and that was by far more demanding than anything RSE required. Although the study and practice of Buddhism moved me to phenomenal experiences of loving compassion, RSE promised that a greater experience was easily attainable. I felt that it was worth any sacrifice, including renouncing my ordination vows in order to gain the state of full realization; something which you as Ramtha claimed to be in possession of. Again, my motivation to attain that realization of enlightenment was to be able to serve others more wisely and powerfully.
Thus, with the exception of the amount required to house and feed myself, all of my earnings and savings went to RSE for the three years that I was a student. I changed my will and made RSE the sole beneficiary of my and my family's estates. It is worth mentioning that though I chose to live a humble life long ago, my family did not. Thank God (not Ramtha), that I came to my senses and revised that will and returned the whole of the two estates to those who require humanitarian aid.
You should know that over $ 80,000 went to RSE in the form of event fees, donations, gifts and purchases of recommended materials. Included in that amount were event fees for those who had not manifested the wealth to do so; despite their doing the disciplines as taught by RSE. Most recently I fully paid for the 2009 BC event & extension for myself and two other students. None of us attended those events and none of us will be back; so if that is the cost of freedom, then as your character Ramtha would say, we "got it on the cheap". I do not regret also donating supplies to RSE because the love with which it was given for my fellow students, you and the staff of RSE still stands; never was it conditional to agreement of perception, belief or anything else.
It does bother me however that many of your current and non-current students could use the money that I spent on my RSE adventure more than you or your corporations right now. I know many of those people personally and they struggle with the cost of housing, food and medical care. You must realize that some of your wealth came through the poverty of those who dedicated themselves to you as Ramtha. You must also know that although they are living in states of poverty now, that many of "your beloved people" were financially stable before they started at RSE. How else could they have afforded to attend so many RSE events and in some cases move closer to RSE in the first place? Know that many are also spiritually destitute now because of a dedication to you, you as Ramtha and RSE; yet you criticize and/or ignore these people. I find that a shameful reflection of what you have become.
Judith, there are people who continue to love and trust a character by the name of Ramtha and they are certain that Ramtha is teaching them something about mastership. They hold fast to the illusion of being god-masters; but simultaneously they struggle to figure out how through dedicating themselves to your method of creating wealth, they have lost it all. Then there are those who are coming to the realization of the deception and are at a loss (financially and otherwise) as to how to piece their lives together in the midst or in the aftermath of leaving RSE. All of these very dear, considerate and loving people deserve more that I, or anyone other than you can assist them with. They deserve to know the truth and they deserve to hear it from you.
No matter how it comes forward, it is my sincere hope that all will come to the realization that you created the Ramtha illusion. Perhaps it will come through the revelation that the whole deception of RSE seems to be based on plagiarized material from various sources, including the writings of Vera Stanley Alder. It is also my hope that all who have ever been involved with RSE, realize that RSE is a corporation and that the RSE Corporation will apparently do anything it takes to protect and promote its own interests; even at the cost of its follower's lives.
I personally came to this realization when I heard RSE's instructions and policy regarding students assisting other students during the Blue College event in 2008. If you recall, there was a severe outbreak of illness amongst the students and staff at that event. This struck some people so severely that the student body was told to check on neighboring tents each morning and on breaks for fellow students who may have become so ill that that they could not rise. We were further advised to notify staff of any such student so that they could be given assistance by staff assigned to that task. We were also told that transportation to medical attention was available for those who desired or required it. I perceive those gestures as RSE's attempt to cover its bases with respect to liability and I base that perception on the other instructions that were given to students at that event.
An appointed teacher of RSE announced from the stage, to all in attendance that no student was to give medical advice or assistance to any other student while on RSE grounds. The announced RSE policy specifically disallowed physical assistance or advice to be provided to students by other students who had medical training while at the ranch. The reason for this was stated as being due to liability issues pertaining to RSE. The need to protect RSE from a potential law suit was openly promoted over helping to ease another human being's discomfort.
That is where my faith in you, Ramtha and RSE came crashing down. When I realized that I was being instructed to let another human being suffer in favor of protecting a corporation's interests, I was devastated. RSE was revealed to me that day as being completely controlled by what I had ironically been taught was mass-to-mass, mundane, victim and lower three seal-consciousnesses. The realization of what I had become dedicated to and all that I had sacrificed toward fulfilling that dedication delivered me to a state of hopeless despair. The pain of that realization still cuts like a knife when I consider how many others have suffered the same fate; or will do so because of a dedication to RSE.
I tell you all of this in the hope that you will understand that I was once very dedicated to you, the belief in Ramtha, RSE and the students of RSE. I see that now as a success on your part and a failure on mine; never again will I be ignorant to mind control, manipulation or emotional terrorism. It took me three years before I saw RSE in a different light than the one that had been programmed into my mind. I perceived that a greater emphasis had been placed on protecting RSE from potential lawsuits, outside opinion and media reports. This was prefaced with restrictive "Conditions for Participation" by RSE in 2007 and that was done presumably to protect copyrights; but I was still quite deluded at that time and had aligned myself with a belief that RSE needed to protect the purity of the teachings. That is what had been repeatedly told to students like me and of course I did not question that. Even so, the true nature of RSE bled through when news about law suits launched by you toward other "spiritual teachers" entered the public forum. By the end of 2008, what I once saw as inspiring and spiritually freeing revealed itself to be nothing more than a mind controlling scam and a money making corporation.
The realization that Ramtha and RSE was and is perpetuated by you for profit at the cost of others spiritual freedom and freedom of thought breaks my heart. Judith you are a victim of this as much as anyone else and my heart goes out to you. I do not know how you will come to be at peace with it within yourself but I sincerely hope that you will. In the mean time I pray that you will see the wisdom in bowing out of it sooner rather than later.
As for me, I have released a lot of what was presented as fact at RSE and filed it under experiences that have brought me a greater understanding of mind control, breach of trust and abuse on levels that I didn't even know were possible. Under your tutelage, I learned to fire up a delusional pattern of thought so that when I got overwhelmed by the solitude and loneliness of my "alone journey", I at least appeared fulfilled. This was just so that the people who loved and cared about me would never suspect or know the extent of my pain. Feel nothing; that is what you and RSE taught as the way to enlightenment; but all it taught me was to live as a sociopath. I learned to rationalize everything under such a delusional pattern of thought, that I could dismiss nearly any being's suffering as self created and self inflicted; including my own.
I can only reconcile the reason that I had these experiences with the consideration that perhaps I was ready to experience what I did; and that it served to bring me greater wisdom of such things. I can not say whether others would reconcile it in a similar way but the posts on EMF would seem to indicate that each person must eventually come to be at peace with it in some way. It is my sincere hope that the outcome of their contemplation and reconciliation does not involve anything but loving compassion for themselves and for others, including you Judith.
Whether the intent behind the use of mind control tactics by you, you as Ramtha and by the staff at RSE is virtuous or not is immaterial. I believe that the tactics are used intentionally and that they are promoted to be used as such on students without the student's knowledge or consent. That, in my opinion provides ample material for addressing the topic of violation of ethical, moral and human rights. That debate is not my intent here but I mention it now because I know that the storm of such a debate is gaining strength and headed in your direction.
For me, the journey through RSE and back has been bitter sweet with respect to friends that remain dedicated to what you teach as a life purpose. I truly love them and wish them an easy journey on a path that I have abandoned. It does bring me sorrow that they hold fast to the belief that they are masters, that they will live for more than two hundred years and that they will bring themselves forth as gods by the time the world ends in 2012 because I see that the potential for a life of fulfillment is being stolen from them. They also believe that after that catastrophic earth and climate change, that they will live on to reseed the planet and restore the population with an evolved race coming from their ranks. You as Ramtha taught them to believe in that just as you taught me. May their god go with them and yours with you.
Through what has been taught by you as Ramtha, by you as JZ Knight and by the staff of RSE, many people hold the belief that they are on an "alone journey". Many others believe that they will go to some other universe and that your fictional character Ramtha will meet them there. Perhaps it will be so. I can not say for certain either way but I am of the belief that is not what awaits anyone on the other side. Still I can tell you that a dear friend of mine from RSE was ready to take his own life and speed up that meeting because his life since going to RSE had become too miserable to continue with. Thankfully through understanding, generosity and loving compassion he is still in this life and I hold his friendship and his life as precious as the virtues that convinced him that his life was more than anything that he believed but had yet to prove. Others who have been your students have not been so fortunate; and tragically, they have succeeded in taking their own life. I do not know what specifically drives a person into such a state of mind that they would choose no life at all over the one that they have; but perhaps a more important contemplation is this. In acceptance that you and you as Ramtha seem to have a way to bring that state of mind forward in some people, how much longer do you intend to wield that as a weapon in the direction of your followers?
When you leave for good Judith, I wonder what will become of the many people who have dedicated their lives to you, to you as Ramtha and to RSE. You have only to read the posts by those who have found their way to EMF to realize that when the character Ramtha disappears from one's life, the wellbeing of the person on all levels is affected and the life itself often hangs in the balance. As of yet it seems that you have done little to accommodate for that potential on a mass scale, even though it is known that you and you as Ramtha will leave your students sooner or later.
Judith, only you know whether you will do so voluntarily or whether you will continue on until you simply die a human death just like every other human being that has ever lived. You might continue to roll along for a while, but if that is your choice, as a friend, I must be honest with you. While attending events in 2008 it was quite apparent that you often loose track of who you are supposed to be. Meanwhile the aging of your body is undeniable and it continues to press up against you; despite your attempts to hide it through cosmetic surgery, botox, hair extensions, make up and extreme exercise. I sincerely hope that you are at peace when the ultimate truth comes upon you. That I most sincerely do.
For others who will be forced to face your leaving and the leaving of Ramtha from their lives there will be as many individual ways of dealing with that situation as there are individuals. Each of us is unique and our problems and joys as well as our reconciliations of them are unique to us. Yet there is a common denominator that is a concern for when the time comes for people to either leave Ramtha & RSE or have Ramtha & RSE leave them; some how it will and must be reconciled. My hope is that as many people possible do that by choice now rather than later in states of isolation and desperation.
Judith, I began to post on EMF because the information that had been posted by others served to assist me when I began to realize that all was not well with me and RSE. It was through EMF that I realized that I was not alone and that in fact many others had experienced similar thoughts both during their time at RSE and after leaving. I post on EMF for those who have made the choice to leave RSE and desire mutual support; as well as for those who simply want more information. It is a forum where one can realize that although the choices that they make are theirs alone, that they need not be alone in the making of them or in the subsequent effect of their making.
Most of us who post on EMF were your students once (some still are), and anything less than compassionate consideration from you would indicate that your love and the love of you as Ramtha is conditional to remaining a current student of RSE. I sincerely hope that is not the case.
From my side I can assure you that I do love you unconditionally and that I do care about you. You Judith, the human being who has strengths and failings like everybody else.
There is a whole lot that I do not know about you and perhaps can not know, but it does not matter. What matters is that I truly am concerned when I realize that for you too there have been or will come times that you are alone with your thoughts and the yearnings of your soul. Perhaps the Ramtha deception is finally coming to an end and you have plans of where to go from there; perhaps not. I am sure that you are aware that there are more and more people who are coming to the realization of the truth about you, Ramtha and RSE and that soon the numbers themselves will speak volumes on EMF and in other places as well.
Judith I know that the desire for happiness lives in you and that the desire extends from you towards others; but that desire is not unique to you. It is our universal true nature and in that state we are unified in the wisdom-power of love itself. With that realization we move beyond the need to be right and can extend our virtues to embrace others who are in need of understanding, compassion and love. In times when all seems lost, that embrace is truly all that will help lift our spirits. So I extend that embrace to you now and trust that you will accept it in the spirit that it is offered.
What ever it may be, the truth will always prevail.
I give what I have written here into the public domain with the understanding that the opinions expressed are mine alone and are not necessarily shared or supported by EMF or its members.
I give my permission to forward this letter to current students of RSE or to the media with a link to www.enlightenmefree.com if any one visiting the EMF message board desires to do that.
With love to all.
Letter to Judith - (EMF) Online Debate Forum HERE
After a person has left a Cult
they go through their personal recovery process. This process includes healing from emotional, psychological, spiritual, and perhaps physical trauma. While each person's story is somewhat different there are phases that people go through while moving on. Ex-group members may find help in talking to others, educating themselves about similar types of groups, and eventually re-adapting to society. The following information is a summary by Margaret Thaler Singer about group recovery processes. Gift yourself with the time it takes to read through all of this material."
"Post-Cult After Effects
After exiting a cult, an individual may experience a period of intense and often conflicting emotions. She or he may feel relief to be out of the group, but also may feel grief over the loss of positive elements in the cult, such as friendships, a sense of belonging or the feeling of personal worth generated by the group's stated ideals or mission. The emotional upheaval of the period is often characterized by "post-cult trauma syndrome":
spontaneous crying sense of loss depression & suicidal thoughts
fear that not obeying the cult's wishes will result in God's wrath or loss of salvation
alienation from family, friends sense of isolation, loneliness due to being surrounded by people who have no basis for understanding cult life fear of evil spirits taking over one's life outside the cult scrupulosity, excessive rigidity about rules of minor importance panic disproportionate to one's circumstances fear of going insane confusion about right and wrong sexual conflicts unwarranted guilt The period of exiting from a cult is usually a traumatic experience and, like any great change in a person's life, involves passing through stages of accommodation to the change:
Disbelief/denial: "This can't be happening. It couldn't have been that bad."
Anger/hostility: "How could they/I be so wrong?" (hate feelings)
Self-pity/depression: "Why me? I can't do this."
Fear/bargaining: "I don't know if I can live without my group. Maybe I can still associate with it on a limited basis, if I do what they want."
Reassessment: "Maybe I was wrong about the group's being so wonderful."
Accommodation/acceptance: "I can move beyond this experience and choose new directions for my life" or... Reinvolvement: "I think I will rejoin the group."
Passing through these stages is seldom a smooth progression. It is fairly typical to bounce back and forth between different stages. Not everyone achieves the stage of accommodation / acceptance. Some return to cult life. But for those who do not, the following may be experienced for a period of several months: flashbacks to cult life simplistic black-white thinking sense of unreality
suggestibility, ie. automatic obedience responses to trigger-terms of the cult's loaded language or to innocent suggestions disassociation (spacing out)
feeling "out of it"
"Stockholm Syndrome": knee-jerk impulses to defend the cult when it is criticized, even if the cult hurt the person difficulty concentrating
incapacity to make decisions
hostility reactions, either toward anyone who criticizes the cult or toward the cult itself
mental confusion low self-esteem
dread of running into a current cult-member by mistake loss of a sense of how to carry out simple tasks dread of being cursed or condemned by the cult hang-overs of habitual cult behaviors like chanting difficulty managing time trouble holding down a job
Most of these symptoms subside as the victim mainstreams into everyday routines of normal life. In a small number of cases, the symptoms continue.
* This information is a composite list from the following sources: "Coming Out of Cults", by Margaret Thaler Singer, Psychology Today, Jan. 1979, P. 75; "Destructive Cults, Mind Control and Psychological Coercion", Positive Action Portland, Oregon, and "Fact Sheet", Cult Hot-Line and Clinic, New York City. "
Margaret Thaler Singer, Ph.D.
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